hugteeth:

YOU TRICKED ME

THE SNAKE IS A LIE.

(Source: miz-chrisie)

gourmetgaming:

Beyond Good and Evil - K-Bups

How many E3s are we going to go through before we receive any news about Beyond Good and Evil 2? Each year it’s brought up, people demanding to know more since a teaser was posted an eternity ago. This desire for a sequel gives me hope for the gaming industry; that in a market saturated with complex clones, what we still yearn for is the simplicity of a beautiful story of friendship and good triumphing over evil (without the need for senseless violence). Sometimes, we don’t even want a quick-time event! We just want to take photos and hang out with a pig, who knew? Initially conceived as a possible early Gourmet Gaming recipe, as I had just finished playing Beyond Good and Evil for the first time last summer, K-Bups were off the cards until I found an incredible cake pop pan in a local store. Sticking to the quasi-Jamaican theme – these K-Bups are beautiful balls of vanilla and coconut sponge, filled with a coconut frosting and coated in a delicate purple chocolate.

This recipe makes 24+ K-Bups.

What you will need: A cake pop pan or a cake pop scoop or a pair of good hands, 2 large mixing bowls, 1 small mixing bowl, 1 large heat resistant bowl, a sieve, a whisk, a wooden spoon, 2 large pans and an icing bag/syringe with a star nozzle.

For the Cake:

170g / ¾ Cup Butter (Room Temperature)

150g / ¾ Cup Caster/Superfine Sugar

2 Large Eggs (Room Temperature)

1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract

225g / 1½ Cups Plain Flour

½ Teaspoon Baking Powder

½ Teaspoon Baking/Bicarbonate Soda

Pinch of Salt

125ml / ½ Cup Coconut Milk (Reduced)

For the Frosting:

120g / ½ Cup Butter (Room Temperature)

150g / 1¾ Cup Icing/Confectioners Sugar

Pinch of Salt

1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract

4-6 Tablespoons Coconut Milk (Reduced)

For the Chocolate Coating:

300g / 1¾ Cups White Chocolate

Purple Chocolate Dye

Edible Purple Dusting (Optional)

Preparing the Cake:

1. First reduce some coconut milk. Do this by bringing it to the boil in a large pan over a medium high heat, then allowing to simmer for about 30 minutes. Transfer it into a clean vessel and set aside to cool.
2. Preheat the oven to 160C/325F. In a large mixing bowl, cream the butter and the sugar together until pale and fluffy. Next add the eggs one at a time and stir in the vanilla extract.
3. In a separate bowl, sieve together the flour, baking power, baking soda and salt. Alternately add a little of the flour mixture, then the reduced coconut milk, until it’s all gone - finishing with the flour mixture.
4. Fill your cake pop tray with the cake mixture and cook for about 15-17 minutes. Allow the cake balls to cool while you prepare the frosting.

Making the Frosting:

1. In a large bowl cream the butter until pale. Add the vanilla and pinch of salt.
2. Slowly sieve in the icing/confectioners sugar and beat well each time. Alternately add the reduced coconut until the desired consistency is achieved.

Preparing the K-Bups:

1. By now the cake balls should be cooled. Take an icing bag/syringe and fill it with the coconut vanilla frosting. Using a medium or small star nozzle with the icing bag, and a gentle touch, carefully slide the nozzle into the cake ball about halfway.
2. Move it around gently to create some space, then carefully, but firmly, squeeze the frosting into the ball.
3. Once it feels solid, or a little bit of frosting escapes, slide the nozzle back out. Repeat this procedure for each of the cake balls. Don’t worry if a few small cracks appear, these will be covered up by the coating.

Alternative Method:

You can of course use the more traditional option of making cake balls by baking the mixture as a cake, crumbing it, and mixing it with the frosting.

Then mould it into balls and create a hole to fill with the frosting. The final step applies to both ways – so you don’t need a cake pop pan at all.

Making the K-Bups:

1. Melt the white chocolate in a large bowl over some boiling water, stirring it occasionally until smooth – being careful not to heat it too much. Add the purple chocolate colouring until happy with the shade.
2. Pop the cake balls one at a time into the chocolate and roll them around until fully coated. Use a fork to raise them out, shake any excess chocolate off, then set on greaseproof paper/baking parchment to dry.
3. Once all the cake balls have been coated in chocolate and are dry, dip them in the melted chocolate again to get an even second coat, then leave to dry.
4. Once the second chocolate coating has solidified, lightly dust the cakes with some iridescent purple dust for the finishing touch.

Exotic in both appearance and taste, these K-Bups are rich, sweet and creamy – in fact that frosting is so good, you might want to keep some for dipping on the side, or just a snack for later. Due to their size and shape, they’re incredibly addictive in that I found myself just casually shovelling them into my mouth, even if my energy bar was already full. The “synthetic food of the Hillyan people”, K-Bups are certainly not from this world; the cake version of a space whale, if you like.

Like this? You might also enjoy the Beyond Good and Evil – Starkos.

the-awesomer:

Best. Cookies. Ever.

No words. Should sent a poet.

Well, color me surprised; I did not know that latex gloves grew in the wild!

(Source: cotdeath)

gourmetgaming:

Team Fortress 2 - Sandvich Edible Device

Many of you asked for it and I’m not one to ignore the masses so here you go - the Team Fortress 2 Sandvich in all it’s glory! Thankfully this actually already comes with a very helpful visual recipe - oh Valve, you’re so good for food in games.

Ingredients:

2 Slices White Bread

Mayonnaise

1 Leaf Lettuce

2 Large Tomato Slices

3 Slices Swiss Cheese

1 Slice Ham

To Garnish:

Green Pimento Olive

Skewer

Making the Sandvich Edible Device:

1. Spread a little bit of mayonnaise on both pieces of bread.
2. On one piece stack the ham, cheese, 2 slices of tomato and the lettuce leaf, then top with the second piece of bread.
3. Cut diagonally and skewer with a pimento olive to serve.

Simple but effective. I’d find it hard to believe that a sandwich could restore all of a Heavy’s health… but this is a SandVich. It’s capable of being transformed into metal (apparently) so it must be pretty damn good - I’ll have to see for myself some time.

luckyshirt:

Dear guy who just made my burrito:

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients from one end to the other, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layers lengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM TO GET TO LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans cannot usually dislocate their jaws to accommodate such methods. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito and not a multi-stage rocket to the planet Fucking Disgustingupiter.

And guess what else, player? You can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer this nonsense. You and I already know this tortilla was made to maintain its physical integrity for thirty seconds once touched.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.

thingsorganizedneatly:

SUBMISSION:

the compulsively tidy ursus wehrli visually organizes life in his latest book, “the art of the clean up”